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Domestic violence is a big problem and there’s a lot of women suffering in silence. They are living with it daily to keep their families together and they are coping with a living hell that many of you can’t ever possibly relate to. I sincerely hope that you never have to.

Physical abuse is just one aspect of domestic violence. There is the emotional abuse and the controlling behaviour which is mentally damaging and can lower your self esteem. You feel worthless. When your abuser gives you a compliment or is nice to you, you are on top of the world with optimism that it is all going to be OK. Until the next time he gets angry over what seems like nothing. Often it is nothing. And you silently despair again and walk on eggshells to try and keep the peace.

Domestic violence comes in many forms, some women don’t even realise that they are being controlled until they try and do something for themselves. You may tell yourself ‘well at least he doesn’t hit me’ or ‘it’s not that bad as long as I do what he wants’ – wrong. You have every right to your own privacy, your own money and your self-respect to be preserved.

A sad story

I was only a young girl when I got to know ‘Jane’ briefly. We worked together. I was only 17 and spotted an advert in a local shop for an assistant. It was a skilled trade and I would have to go to college to do it. I didn’t want to go to college. I wanted a few weeks wages to be able to buy clothes and make-up before I went back to carry on with my A Levels after the summer holidays. I maybe worked there for a month before my excuses of being unable to get to the course they had arranged for me were starting to border on the ridiculous. I left the job and I didn’t see Jane again until many years after.

Jane was a very pretty girl and very friendly. Always bubbly,

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